Feature: A look at Princesses

As long as there have been plumbers in gaming there have been princesses, princesses who have needed saving. So who are my favourite Princesses I’ve encountered?

5. Princess Peach
Yes I’ve got her in fifth pretty much because I’ve already wrote my thing on her being absolutely crazy. Here’s the quote:

OK she must have been about 18 the first time she was kidnapped, our fiery red head was saved by the Super Mario Bros., at the time she had seven advisor’s who would disguise themselves as her (maybe using the science mentioned in point three), this happens in SMB1 and Lost-levels, now going on with current tradition that she gets kidnapped on her birthday, I say that the king dies sometime after her 19th birthday. With that she goes bat shit crazy. She dies her hair blonde, re-writes the history books to say that she had never had red hair, eventually she drops the toadstool and calls herself Peach. Add into that the fact that she often will have sporting tournaments in her kingdom (golf/tennis/karting) with a guy who has kidnapped her several times is just outrageous. We’ll not even get into the fact that she’s about 23 and probably doing a man in his forties. Seriously she’s a young 20’s blonde princess and picks a fat Italian American plumber?! Oh I’ve been kidnapped on my Birthday AGAIN I can’t wait until next year when I have another birthday party, oh I better invite the Super Mario Bros. just in case.

4. Princess Sara

Princess Sara

Very helpful in the original Final Fantasy game of giving me a passage in the Chaos shrine, she also rocks up in FFIII helping us several times throughout the game, and having a bit of a flirt with Ingus. Then there’s FFIX where it turns out she’s one of the main characters (not going to spoil it for you). So you may think aww good she’s a nice Princess, but it’s when you look at her 8-bit carnation that she’s flipping genius. This is a webcomic spoofing Final Fantasy, in this version they become fully aware that with her being kidnapped quite a few times, the chances are is that she knows all about how to be a super villain so trains up poor Garland. Brilliant.
3. Princess Daisy

Daisy the footballer is a princess

And people say Luigi gets a raw deal? Having only been kidnapped once, Daisy shows up as not being absolutely crazy. Obviously she cares for her friend Peach, hence why she is always there to aid her during games such as Mario Party, Kart, Tennis etc. She vanished from the series for a while and many people have speculated as to why that actually is. The logical reason is Daisy actually cares for her kingdom and actually puts time into helping her parents rule this wonderful peaceful land.

Also Daisy is so cool she was the main love interest in SMBMovie, though the thing I don’t get about her VG appearance is she’s supposed to be a TomBoy but LOVES flowers. Go figure.
2. Fat Princesses

Fat Princess is a brilliant game, it’s a PSN games (though also on PSP) in which you have to save your fat Princess from the opposing team. These are Princesses with carefree attitudes, getting kidnapped quite regular (more than anyone else on this list) they don’t really care for a simple reason. They love Cake. When they eat Cake they get fat. Hence why they are fat Princesses, absolutely great humour in this gaming thoroughly mocking the “kidnapped princess” storyline in games. Genius.

1. Oh come on did you expect anyone else?

This is a Princess who can look after herself so much so that she was trusted with the great Ocarina of Time to look after, this being one of the Hylian’s must dear symbol. She’s always been there to help Link by giving vital information and even as a playable character in Spirit Tracks. The Series is named after her so much so that most people think Link is called Zelda! Not the case, this is her Legend and a name that is passed from generation to generation. Oh and:

Zelda as Sheik

To this day one of the best “I didn’t see that coming” style twists in any video game is that Zelda has been this guy who’s been badass and saving you and shit. So for the addition of Sheik I put Zelda at number one.

Who are your favourite Princesses? What about Rosalina? What about all the others in random RPGs? Let me know what you think and share using these wonderful buttons!


Posted on 07/02/2011, in Features. Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. Disappointment at leaving out the lolicon-arifiec Princess from the Princess Marker series.

  1. Pingback: New to Nintendo Lee? «

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